3.32pm 23 Aug 2006 Wednesday
Eeks. The online Physics class doesn't seem like such a good idea after all but it's too late to back out. Just ordered an at-home kit which I'm supposed to use to do the labs. Dang it! I thought it was all theoretical. And it cost me more than a hundred buckeroos!
So much for short cuts...
Anyway. Back to more important musings like my wonderful holiday in Germany where I visited my lovely H. (I swear I must be PMS-y since I'm swinging from one mood to the next so quickly)
Our first weekend after being apart for 1 month was spent with his parents in Wendtorf, which would have been fine, if not for the fact that we needed time to readjust to each other. Unfortunately neither of us had forseen that so it ended up being somewhat awkward, although I've to admit that it did get us into a routine of sorts, since his parents' place followed a rather predictable schedule.
If I had to condense my recent trip to Germany into 1 word, it is without a doubt "fruit".
We walked to his father's garden and stopped for scrumptious blackberries, immensely sour plums and unripe apples. When we were at his garden, his father reached over to the neighbour's unkempt yard for some incredibly ripe and flavourful raspberries. After that, H and I were inspired to go fruit hunting and discovered a long blackberry hedge in Wilhemshaven, although the fruit was nowhere as good. We also stopped to take a look at a plum tree on the way to badminton, and boy were we glad that we did - the plum was succulent, sweet, and had a rich taste I presume you can only get from a wild grown fruit.
I can still remember sinking my teeth into the plump nectarines his mum bought - H always insists on cutting the fruit up, which I admit makes it easier to eat, but part of the novelty IS having fruit juice dribbling down your chin and fingers. Ooh and those yummy cherries we had doubted because the cherry season should have been over... Dang it. We should have bought everything the lady had! The cherries were ripe but not soft, and extremely juicy and sweet. Yummmmy!
But now I'm back into the land of fake fruits, where nectarines are rock hard, sour, "siap siap" (which roughly means acidic in Teochew, a Chinese dialect) and have a waxy appearance; where blueberries/ raspberries/ blackberries cost a bomb but are nowhere as nice as the ones we pick ourselves; and the kiwis are disappointingly sour and hard, despite being allowed to ripen on the counter for several days.
Sigh. That's the closest I think I'll ever get to my Enid Blyton induced dream of picking blackberries and eating them until my face is grimy with its sticky juice, and then falling asleep, only to dream of pixies, elves and goblins dancing around me.
Unless we grow our own blackberry/ raspberry hedge and plum tree and all those goodies when we have a pretty cottage by the lake... I think I might be overindulging in those dreams in effort to stay away from the reality of applying for my internship, which is coming up realllly quickly.
Wednesday, August 23, 2006
Wednesday, August 09, 2006
"Don't presume to tell me what I will and will not do. You don't know me."
8.36am 9 Aug 2006 Wednesday
It's National Day. I miss the fireworks, the gatherings that would have taken place... but that's not why I'm writing today. Flying off to my love in 5 hours and I'm very excited! Finally get to wear my cute little plaid skirt from Target.
So today I was reading a blog linked from someone else's blog, and it said on the sidebar: "You don't know me. Don't ever think you do." That reminded me of the famous phrase from the Titanic that Rose told Jack just as she was about to jump, (at least I think that was the scene..) "Don't presume to tell me what I will and will not do. You don't know me."
Why are some people so fixated with that phrase? I mean, if they choose to put up a mask in public to hide their melancholy, their sadness, their pain, why act cool when people see through them, or attempt to know them better? If you're really disinterested in people knowing the real you, then by all means stay away from others.
Unfortunately, the fact that they can't stay away from people and from making friends show that they do want someone to break into their heart - they're just unwilling to be honest with themselves and with their friends. How fair is that to their own selves, and the people who have treated them well?
When something happens and their actual emotions leak through and people say, "But that's not like you," they flare up. If it's so hard for you to be truthful to the people around you, don't blame them for thinking they know you, that they are your friend. Because friends are supposed to be honest with each other, and to help carry your burden. If you're the one who chose to shut yourself out and only present one side of your personality to others, why blame your friends, or people who think they know you, for not knowing you?
Having said that, I don't think I actually have any friends who have said that to me. It's just that I've seen and heard people say that, and it never fails to leave me wondering why they do something like that to hurt themselves, and their friends.
Anyhow. Donna is coming for me soon - better finish up some last minute packing!
It's National Day. I miss the fireworks, the gatherings that would have taken place... but that's not why I'm writing today. Flying off to my love in 5 hours and I'm very excited! Finally get to wear my cute little plaid skirt from Target.
So today I was reading a blog linked from someone else's blog, and it said on the sidebar: "You don't know me. Don't ever think you do." That reminded me of the famous phrase from the Titanic that Rose told Jack just as she was about to jump, (at least I think that was the scene..) "Don't presume to tell me what I will and will not do. You don't know me."
Why are some people so fixated with that phrase? I mean, if they choose to put up a mask in public to hide their melancholy, their sadness, their pain, why act cool when people see through them, or attempt to know them better? If you're really disinterested in people knowing the real you, then by all means stay away from others.
Unfortunately, the fact that they can't stay away from people and from making friends show that they do want someone to break into their heart - they're just unwilling to be honest with themselves and with their friends. How fair is that to their own selves, and the people who have treated them well?
When something happens and their actual emotions leak through and people say, "But that's not like you," they flare up. If it's so hard for you to be truthful to the people around you, don't blame them for thinking they know you, that they are your friend. Because friends are supposed to be honest with each other, and to help carry your burden. If you're the one who chose to shut yourself out and only present one side of your personality to others, why blame your friends, or people who think they know you, for not knowing you?
Having said that, I don't think I actually have any friends who have said that to me. It's just that I've seen and heard people say that, and it never fails to leave me wondering why they do something like that to hurt themselves, and their friends.
Anyhow. Donna is coming for me soon - better finish up some last minute packing!
Monday, August 07, 2006
The Fanatic Cook
I should do something like that!
Oh, wait a minute.. I'm not such a good cook/ photographer/ designer/ writer.........
hrm. Back to the drawing board.
I should do something like that!
Oh, wait a minute.. I'm not such a good cook/ photographer/ designer/ writer.........
hrm. Back to the drawing board.
Suddenly inspired
9.39am 7 Aug 2006 Monday
Things I ought to be doing now:
1. Writing my lab report
2. Lying on the mall outside the library and enjoying the beeeoootiful cloudy, impossibly blue skies.
3. Not writing this blog entry
The weather is perfect today, with a mild breeze passing by every now and then, and the sharp contrast of the white clouds, cobalt blue skies, fresh green grass and red adobe bricked campus buildings is breathtakingly beautiful.
I came to a conclusion while driving to school and listening to soppy songs, that there are basically 2 types of relationships that I've been through: the emotionally destructive; and the constructive, of course. I'll focus on the former because that's what inspired this post.
The memory of the relationship still strikes you now and then when you're not on guard, and you suddenly feel this... odd sensation that shakes your entire being, down to the bone marrow. It's not a pleasant nor unpleasant feeling, neither is it a physical jolt. The only analogy it is remotely close to, is the feeling of seeing a straight line that seems crooked. Mind you, it's not the memories you have with the person, nor is it the memory of the person, per se. It's like a what-if loop that your mind plays, which I can only attribute to the mysterious circumstances of the death of that relationship. Anyway. I feel a little sad that I still have Jeremy in my system, and it feels as if I'm mentally unfaithful to H. That is never good but how can you purge someone out of your system, especially if you cannot approach him because he's not the type of be truthful and help you get over him?
hehe makes me realise how good I've had it with the other ex-boyfriends.
But anyway. That pesky thought aside, I just came up with a brilliant idea of surprising people coming to my graduation! See, that's what I daydream of before I even graduate. Anyway. My welcome-to-Tucson kit will include:
- A canvas bag with UA colours/ motifs (???)
- An itinerary: Campus tour, Mt Lemmon tour, Kitt Peak trip, 4th Ave St fair, 7 falls (???), Desert museum
- A UA t-shirt
- A UA flag (like the ones cheesy tour guides always carry)
- A kokopelli or cactus something (magnet? mug? pen-holder? photo frame might be good- then they can all frame their favourite photo with the graduate!)
- A Tucson/ UA collage!
Of the Tucson/ UA collage, I will include:
- photos of my favourite tree in school throughout the seasons (well, basically when it's green, yellow/orange, and bare)
- sunset views
- mountain views
- roses at College of AG
- cactus views
- wildlife (eg cottontail bunnies, roadrunners, quails, etc)
Oooh! So excited!!!
P/S: KKK: shh!!! Don't you speak of this to anyone, OK?
Things I ought to be doing now:
1. Writing my lab report
2. Lying on the mall outside the library and enjoying the beeeoootiful cloudy, impossibly blue skies.
3. Not writing this blog entry
The weather is perfect today, with a mild breeze passing by every now and then, and the sharp contrast of the white clouds, cobalt blue skies, fresh green grass and red adobe bricked campus buildings is breathtakingly beautiful.
I came to a conclusion while driving to school and listening to soppy songs, that there are basically 2 types of relationships that I've been through: the emotionally destructive; and the constructive, of course. I'll focus on the former because that's what inspired this post.
The memory of the relationship still strikes you now and then when you're not on guard, and you suddenly feel this... odd sensation that shakes your entire being, down to the bone marrow. It's not a pleasant nor unpleasant feeling, neither is it a physical jolt. The only analogy it is remotely close to, is the feeling of seeing a straight line that seems crooked. Mind you, it's not the memories you have with the person, nor is it the memory of the person, per se. It's like a what-if loop that your mind plays, which I can only attribute to the mysterious circumstances of the death of that relationship. Anyway. I feel a little sad that I still have Jeremy in my system, and it feels as if I'm mentally unfaithful to H. That is never good but how can you purge someone out of your system, especially if you cannot approach him because he's not the type of be truthful and help you get over him?
hehe makes me realise how good I've had it with the other ex-boyfriends.
But anyway. That pesky thought aside, I just came up with a brilliant idea of surprising people coming to my graduation! See, that's what I daydream of before I even graduate. Anyway. My welcome-to-Tucson kit will include:
- A canvas bag with UA colours/ motifs (???)
- An itinerary: Campus tour, Mt Lemmon tour, Kitt Peak trip, 4th Ave St fair, 7 falls (???), Desert museum
- A UA t-shirt
- A UA flag (like the ones cheesy tour guides always carry)
- A kokopelli or cactus something (magnet? mug? pen-holder? photo frame might be good- then they can all frame their favourite photo with the graduate!)
- A Tucson/ UA collage!
Of the Tucson/ UA collage, I will include:
- photos of my favourite tree in school throughout the seasons (well, basically when it's green, yellow/orange, and bare)
- sunset views
- mountain views
- roses at College of AG
- cactus views
- wildlife (eg cottontail bunnies, roadrunners, quails, etc)
Oooh! So excited!!!
P/S: KKK: shh!!! Don't you speak of this to anyone, OK?
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